Thursday, November 05, 2015
Tuesday, October 06, 2015
Summer of Healing Done.
I know. Summer has been over here for a while. I have actually worn socks and close toed shoes already! Though today I am in my Birkenstocks because I love them and miss them already. Tomorrow will be colder so I guess socks again? But still Birks!!
The summer of 2015 has gone down in my history as the summer of radiation. Radiation itself is not so hard to do. The worst part of it is the monotony of everyday appointments and the tiredness.
I was lucky. No chemo first. I cannot imagine what it would be like with a system that has be compromised more than mine was. One of the things that I learned with my everyday appointments was just how lucky I was and still am. I have retained my wholeness. All my parts are essentially intact and I am not fighting to stay alive. That is my death is not imminent. I never felt scared I was losing.
The psychological trauma created by coming face to face with ones own death is as much an issue in dealing with cancer as actually dealing with the Cancer itself. That sentence wore me out!
So now I happily sit in my shop and enjoy life. Enjoy that my energy is coming back. And for some reason right now. I am avoiding knitting even though I have a fibre show in Mid November to prepare for. I have always worked better under pressure.
Kessie does not look too happy with her latest modelling gig. She knows the coat is too big because I knit this dog coat to donate to a fund raising event. Though I don't think she could handle the hood very well.
The summer of 2015 has gone down in my history as the summer of radiation. Radiation itself is not so hard to do. The worst part of it is the monotony of everyday appointments and the tiredness.
I was lucky. No chemo first. I cannot imagine what it would be like with a system that has be compromised more than mine was. One of the things that I learned with my everyday appointments was just how lucky I was and still am. I have retained my wholeness. All my parts are essentially intact and I am not fighting to stay alive. That is my death is not imminent. I never felt scared I was losing.
The psychological trauma created by coming face to face with ones own death is as much an issue in dealing with cancer as actually dealing with the Cancer itself. That sentence wore me out!
Thursday, July 30, 2015
Recovery Mode
Finding out that you have a cancerous lump is scary.
What is even scarier is the speed with which all the wheels of treatment start. Scary because when there is speed in treatment means it is very serious.
Two weeks after finding out, surgery. Three weeks later meet with the Radiology Oncologist, one week later the Medical Oncologist. Two days later radiology mapping is done. Eight days after that starts the radiation which for me will be 25 treatments over 5 weeks.
Three months of giving your life over to the medical establishment completely and absolutely if you choose that route. Which I have.
At this point I am a day away from mapping where I hear I will have a CT Scan and be marked up with permanent marker. (These colours will join the still blue stains from blue dye injection to locate sentinel lymph nodes. I am over joyed. I am a colouring book.) Then I will get 3 small pinprick tattoos to assist in the actual radiation procedure.
All of this is to reduce the chance of cancer returning because it was all removed in surgery. I am glad..no not the word... thankful ...that I got my lump checked on. I am thankful that it was a small tumour that I could feel while it was small. I am thankful there is a location and a system in my community where I can get help keeping the cancer away from me for as long as possible.
I had a day away from all of this on Sunday when I spent a day on the beach. Yes under a canopy with lots of sunscreen and a hat. No sunburn this year. I needed to stop and breath deeply before more dragging through the healing system.
What is even scarier is the speed with which all the wheels of treatment start. Scary because when there is speed in treatment means it is very serious.
Two weeks after finding out, surgery. Three weeks later meet with the Radiology Oncologist, one week later the Medical Oncologist. Two days later radiology mapping is done. Eight days after that starts the radiation which for me will be 25 treatments over 5 weeks.
Three months of giving your life over to the medical establishment completely and absolutely if you choose that route. Which I have.
At this point I am a day away from mapping where I hear I will have a CT Scan and be marked up with permanent marker. (These colours will join the still blue stains from blue dye injection to locate sentinel lymph nodes. I am over joyed. I am a colouring book.) Then I will get 3 small pinprick tattoos to assist in the actual radiation procedure.
All of this is to reduce the chance of cancer returning because it was all removed in surgery. I am glad..no not the word... thankful ...that I got my lump checked on. I am thankful that it was a small tumour that I could feel while it was small. I am thankful there is a location and a system in my community where I can get help keeping the cancer away from me for as long as possible.
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| Sunset over Georgian Bay |
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| Happy 65th Birthday to my ever patient husband. |
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
Summer 2015 Update
Yes I have not blogged in an very long time.
I have been busy building my online shop over at www.kniterary.com . And keeping the brick and mortar shop functioning.
Personal life still exists but revolves around my business. I think this is what happens with all small business owners.
Surprisingly I have been in business for 8 years. I thought I would last 5 years but I can't walk away. A great community has been built with this shop as the core. I love crafters. I enjoy being around creative people so I keep plugging away.
Recently, very recently, the shop have moved from our quaint little green house into an even older store front smack downtown in Whitby, Ontario.
The space opened up as a grocery store in 1850 so it comes with all the quirks and angles that the other place had.
On the personal front life has had its ups and downs. Still all the wonderful people in my life.
With one addition of a grand nephew who is growing up way too quickly already.
Rhea has her first full time job and Patrick has one more year of film school.
I have had a small bout with Cancer. Found a lump. Had it removed along with sentinel lymph nodes. Cancer was contained and is all removed now. Peed blue for 48 hours.
Now waiting to have 5 weeks radiation therapy. But all is going to be ok. Thank the stars.
May be using this blog as a bit of therapy to ward off the depression that comes with cancer treatments.
Yes I am still knitting non stop. Prepping for a group show in November right now as well as knitting samples for the shop and baby boy things. And I want to do socks for Christmas...
Shawls seem to be my thing lately.
Til next time.
I have been busy building my online shop over at www.kniterary.com . And keeping the brick and mortar shop functioning.
Personal life still exists but revolves around my business. I think this is what happens with all small business owners.
Surprisingly I have been in business for 8 years. I thought I would last 5 years but I can't walk away. A great community has been built with this shop as the core. I love crafters. I enjoy being around creative people so I keep plugging away.
Recently, very recently, the shop have moved from our quaint little green house into an even older store front smack downtown in Whitby, Ontario.
On the personal front life has had its ups and downs. Still all the wonderful people in my life.
Rhea has her first full time job and Patrick has one more year of film school.
I have had a small bout with Cancer. Found a lump. Had it removed along with sentinel lymph nodes. Cancer was contained and is all removed now. Peed blue for 48 hours.
Now waiting to have 5 weeks radiation therapy. But all is going to be ok. Thank the stars.
May be using this blog as a bit of therapy to ward off the depression that comes with cancer treatments.
Yes I am still knitting non stop. Prepping for a group show in November right now as well as knitting samples for the shop and baby boy things. And I want to do socks for Christmas...
Shawls seem to be my thing lately.
Til next time.
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